Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize