I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
