I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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