Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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