It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
