It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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