I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Randomize
