he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
