Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i will never coherently bang her
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize