But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
