if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
