I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
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