By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
FUCK WHALES
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