Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
