By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Randomize
