that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
