$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
