Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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