I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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