You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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