16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
