well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Randomize
