Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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