I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
