You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
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He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
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We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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