I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
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Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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