it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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