I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
