all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
