Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
The Olympian is in my bed
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize