Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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