you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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