JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
