All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Is Oprah even human
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Randomize