Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
i believe in u and ur pee
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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