alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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