Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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