My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
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