so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
