apparently the secret to your success is patron
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
