i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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