Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
