Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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