I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
i would one night stand the shit outta him
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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