So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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