alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
