Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
