Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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