I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize