Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
